Financial planning tips for “sandwich carers” feeling the squeeze between children and ageing parents

14 May 2026

For those caring for older and younger family members, balancing your own financial needs while shouldering other responsibilities can leave you feeling squeezed.

You may have come across the term “sandwich generation”. Coined by social worker Dorothy Miller in 1981, it describes those caring for ageing parents while raising children.

In these times of longer life expectancies, rising care costs, and adult children remaining financially tied to parents for longer, you’re far from alone if you’re feeling the strain.

In fact, figures from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) suggest there are almost a million sandwich carers in the UK, with around half of them aged between 45 and 64.

While balancing dual caring responsibilities could prove emotionally taxing, it can also be financially challenging.

Unique financial challenges you may face if you’re a sandwich carer

One of the tricky things about being a sandwich carer is that the financial pressures don’t typically arise straight away. Instead, costs can often creep up unnoticed while your attention is diverted.

For example, over time, you may start to notice the financial impact of:

• Supporting adult children with rent or everyday costs, especially if they still live at home
• Contributing to university expenses or a first home
• Supporting parents with care costs, living costs, or unexpected bills, particularly if they’re less well-off.

Initially, it may all seem easy to manage, but balancing additional costs alongside your mortgage, household bills, and rising living expenses can eventually take its toll. Not only could you feel the financial stretch in the present, but it could also quietly jeopardise your future financial stability.

The good news is that there are steps you could take to help protect both your own and your family’s financial security.

5 financial planning tips to protect you and your family

1. Prioritise your financial security

Putting your own face mask on before helping others can be a useful prompt, because you can’t help others if you’re not in a strong position to do so.

Above all, while it may feel counterintuitive from a caring point of view, prioritising your own financial wellbeing ahead of others isn’t selfish – in fact, doing so is more likely to mean you can continue to support your loved ones both now and in the future.

One of the best ways to support your financial wellbeing is to pay yourself first – when your income arrives, put a portion aside and divert it directly to your pension, savings, or investment.

When people feel financial pressure, pension contributions are often the first thing they let lapse. While this may make life more manageable in the short term, it could leave a serious dent in your retirement income, creating a tricky long-term problem and leaving you with limited time to address it.

If you do need to adjust your pension contributions:

• Review your budget and set contributions at a more affordable level
• Prioritise your workplace pension, so you can benefit from your employer contributions
• Make sure you increase contributions again when circumstances improve

Over time, paying small, consistent amounts into your pension could make a meaningful difference to your long-term financial security.

Bear in mind that a pension is a long-term investment not normally accessible until 55 (57 from April 2028). The fund value may fluctuate and can go down, which could impact the level of pension benefits available. Also, the tax implications of pension withdrawals will be based on your individual circumstances. Thresholds, percentage rates, and tax legislation may change.

2. Protect your income

As a sandwich carer, if you’re also continuing in your career and able to keep earning, it’s wise to take precautions to protect your income.

Without your earnings, you’ll not only struggle to fund your own lifestyle, but you may be unable to continue to support your loved ones.

Though an unpleasant scenario to envisage, it’s important to consider the repercussions if you became ill or suffered an injury that prevented you from working.

To guard against such difficult circumstances impacting you and the rest of your family, consider arranging income protection. We can help you to understand your options and ensure you’re paying an appropriate premium for protection that will make a difference should you need to make a claim.

Note that financial protection plans typically have no cash-in value at any time and cover will cease at the end of the term. If premiums stop, then cover will lapse. Cover is subject to terms and conditions and may have exclusions.

It’s also wise to ensure you have a resilient, easy-to-access emergency fund to help form a buffer against any short-term unplanned payments that arise with no notice. We normally recommend you have enough cash to cover normal expenditure for between three to six months, but if you’re caring for others, having more on hand may provide additional peace of mind.

3. Talk to your parents about their finances

Among the many challenges of being a grown-up, one of the hardest adjustments comes when you begin to notice the role reversal with your parents.

Depending on circumstances, you may need to bring up topics that may previously have been brushed under the carpet. And yet, as a sandwich carer, it’s vital that you sit down and have a clear conversation about your parents’ finances.

These discussions can often feel awkward, but avoiding them is more likely to create more stress – and the longer you leave it, the trickier it will become to address.

Here are a few helpful starting points:

• Find out whether your parents have a financial adviser
• Understand their income, savings, and care preferences
• Ask if they’ve written a will or have Lasting Powers of Attorney (LPAs) in place.

Please note, the Financial Conduct Authority (FCA) does not regulate will-writing or Lasting Powers of Attorney.

Having a shared understanding doesn’t mean taking control. In fact, you may find they are relieved to talk about their circumstances having not wanted to worry you.

4. Think about how best to provide financial support to your children

Rising rents and house prices are contriving to make it tough for young adults to move out of the family home. According to research from the Skipton Group, 5 million adults still live with their parents and 98% of them can’t afford to leave.

As a result, more and more parents are acting as the Bank of Family – by helping with rent, everyday costs, or a deposit for a first home.

If you’re providing financial support, set clear boundaries early. Be open about what you can and can’t afford and ensure you create a financial framework that supports both their needs and yours.

Encourage positive financial habits by discussing things like:

• Setting a monthly budget and managing regular expenses
• Building a healthy emergency fund
• Saving consistently, even in small amounts.

And remember, the best support you can offer doesn’t only involve cash handouts. Consider instead how you can best help them to increase their financial independence.

If you think your adult children would benefit from talking to a financial planner, get in touch or invite them along to your next meeting – we’d be delighted to answer their questions.

Read more: Expecting to play Bank of Family this year? Here’s what you need to consider first

5. Take steps to protect your family’s wealth with an estate plan

Having already touched on will-writing and ensuring LPAs are in place, it’s important to check your family have taken appropriate measures to transfer smoothly between generations when the time comes.

If you’re the primary carer for elderly relatives, it’s even more crucial to ensure that your parents have written their wills. And encouraging wider conversations with the whole family could help to avoid potential disputes.

Will-writing extends to you and your partner, too. If you don’t already have a will, make time to write one – and review it at least once a year to ensure it reflects changing circumstances.

If you have enough capital to support ageing parents and adult children without feeling squeezed, you may need expert help to ensure family wealth passes between generations without being eroded by Inheritance Tax (IHT).

The FCA does not regulate estate planning. However, with careful planning, you could find useful opportunities to support your loved ones while also reducing tax, protecting your assets, and passing on wealth efficiently.

This is another area where we can provide bespoke support and advice. To find out more about strategies that may be suitable for your family, please get in touch.

Get in touch

To find out more about how we could help you and your family navigate the financial concerns of caring for ageing relatives while raising your children, please email [email protected] or call 0161 8080200.

Please note

This article is for general information only and does not constitute advice. The information is aimed at individuals only.

All information is correct at the time of writing and is subject to change in the future.

Workplace pensions are regulated by The Pensions Regulator.